 I strive to be worthy of you.
#IDIOT
#DUMMY
# A lie in time saves nine.
#An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
#Faith goes out through the window when beauty comes in at the door.
#How many "coming men" has one known? Where on earth do they all go to?
#I must have slipped a disk - my pack hurts.
#I despise the pleasure of pleasing people whom I despise.
#I like work; it fascinates me; I can sit and look at it for hours.
#I never fail to convince an audience that the best thing they can do is to go away.
#It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.
#It's not reality that's important, but how you perceive things.
#Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
#God is subtle but he is not malicious
#Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
#Money will say more in one moment than the most eloquent lover can in years.
#My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life there.
#Never call a man a fool; borrow from him.
#Never drink from your finger bowl - it contains only water.
#Never say you know a man until you have divided an inheritance with him.
#No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
#Of all forms of caution, caution in love is the most fatal.
#Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts - for support rather than illumination.
#Old men are fond of giving good advice to console themselves for their inability to set bad examples.
#People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them.
#Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.
#Please put your brain in gear before engaging your mouth.
#She's learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time putting into words.
#Some people are discovered;others are found out.
#Happiness is unattainable until you stop looking for it.
#That must be wonderful!  I don't understand it at all.
#The best prophet of the future is the past.
#The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
#An epigram: a worthless whole, its body brevity and wit its soul.
#The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.
#The plural of spouse is spice.
#There's at least one fool in every married couple.
#This computer will self-destruct in five minutes.
#To criticize the incompetent is easy; it is more difficult to criticize the competent.
#Today is a good day to bribe a high ranking public official.
#What passes for woman's intuition is often nothing more than man's transparency.
#When God endowed human beings with brains, She did not intend to guarantee them.
#Why did the Lord give us so much quickness of movement unless it was to avoid responsibility?
#Words must be weighed, not counted.
#You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful friend and believe anything nice anyone says about you.
#You will be surprised by a loud noise.
#Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.
#Behind every argument is someone's ignorance.
#By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.
#Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of genius.
#Everyone complains of his memory, no one of his judgment.
#Everything bows to success, even grammar.
#He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
#She who falls in love with herself will have no rivals.
#He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.
#Lonely men seek companionship; Lonely women sit at home - they never meet.
#The average woman would rather have beauty than brains because the average man can see better than he can think.
#When God made man,  She made a terrible mistake.
#I used to be indecisive but now I'm not so sure.
#Women like the simple things in life - like men.
#Do you ever get tired of being wrong?
# The Econet System is evidently incompatible with the rest of the Universe.
#A man is as young as he feels - after he's tried to prove it.
#Beware of the smile of a trade union leader and the promises of a politician.
#You know that you're over the hill - when the mind makes a promise that that your body can't fill.
#The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears this is true.
#There's no smoke without the worm turning.
#There's more to grapefruit than meets the eye.
#Why is there only one Monopolies Commission ?
#The only way to get ahead is to become a head-hunter.
#The secret of life is to be in the right room.
#Everything of importance has been said before by someone who did not discover it.
#All generalisations are dangerous, even this one.
#There are exceptions to every rule ; including this one.
#A psychologist is someone who suffers from delusions of accuracy.
#The first shall be First and the last shall be Last.
#Ah! - another soul on my wavelength.
#A man's fate is a man's fate and life is but an illusion.
#Oh no !- not YOU again !
#Thought is reality, matter an illusion.
#Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
#A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg.
#What garlic is to salad, insanity is to art.
#Abstract art ?  A product of the untalented, sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
#Painting is the art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critics.
#Power can corrupt, but absolute power is absolutely delightful.
#Education is the process of casting false pearls before real swine.
#Too much education is bad for the brain.
#Too much learning is bad for the imagination.
#They said the job couldn't be done - but he set right to it - he tackled the job that couldn't be done - and he couldn't do it.
#Cognito, ergo sum - I think; therefore my hardware permits me to be.
#Cognito, ergo sum - I think therefore I think I think therefore I think I think I think...
#An honest politician is one who when bought stays bought.
#Scandal is gossip made tedious by morality.
#A bore is a person who talks when you wish him to listen.
#If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
#You CAN propel yourself forward by patting yourself on the back.
#Chisolm's Third Law, Corollary 1:If you explain so clearly that no one can misunderstand,somebody will.
#To do is to be - Nietzsche To be is to do - Sartre Do be do be do - Sinatra.
#A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.
#Any given program, once running, is obsolete.
#You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get him to float on his back you've really achieved something.
#When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you know the answer.
#Nothing is impossible for the person who doesn't have to do it.
#Anything free is worth what you pay for it.
#Lost interest - It's so bad I've lost apathy.
#Murphy's Fifth Law:   If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
#When all else fails, read the instructions.
#No program can be both completely general and internally consistent at the same time.
#Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac; you can always take something for it.
#Do not believe in miracles -- rely on them.
#Ahhhhhhhh,         I forgot what I was going to say.
#A poet who reads his verse in public may have other nasty habits.
#The preferred habitat of Small change is under seat cushions.
#All men are created unequal.
#One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
#Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
#Secrecy is the beginning of tyranny.
#Yield to temptation; it may never pass your way again.
#The grass may be greener next door but it's just as hard to cut.
#Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.
#Saudi Arabia: A fuel's paradise.
#Etc is a symbol used to make others believe we know more than we do.
#Pascal users shall inherit the Earth. BASIC users shall inherit the mess they create.
#The silliest thing possible is to spend your whole life being sensible.
#Communication is possible only between equals.
#1982 makes 1984 seem like 1978 !
#It is a fact of life that computer programs of consequence are rarely correct.
#Manners are especially the need of the plain - The pretty can get away with anything.
#Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.
#Expediency is the mother of invention.
#Don't do, delegate -  Delegation  is the mark of a good manager.
#I never forget a face, but in your case I'm willing to make an exception.
#Idealism increases in direct proportion to one's distance from the problem.
#Your ideals evaporate as the heat of competition increases.
#Virtue is insufficient temptation.
#If you don't say anything, you won't be called upon to repeat it.
#Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you.
#There'd be a great improvement if they shot less film and more producers.
#A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.
#You don't have a single redeeming defect.
#Your imagination resembles the wings of an ostrich.
#Democracy - 'The art of running a circus from the monkey cage'.
#Why do Volvo drivers think they are more worthy of salvation than the motorists they hit.
#Oh dear, first the magic went out of my marriage, now it's gone out of my Volvo - Never underestimate the destructive power of a woman.
#In Communism Man exploits Man - In a democracy its the other way round.
#Justice delayed is justice denied. Freedom defined is freedom denied.
#Let them eat micros.
#Knowledge is power.
#He who controls the information runs the show.
#Who sees the variety and not the unity, wanders on from death to death.
#A computer program - Instructions which, being taught, return to plague the inventor.
#Power does not corrupt -  Fear corrupts - possibly the fear of losing power.
#You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time and that has long been sufficient for any government.
#  Everything is connected to everything else including Nothing.
#Ban the Bomb  Make the world safer for conventional warfare.
#Do UNIX users get C-sick ?
#The thing that niggles away continuously at the back of my mind is, why did God give the tortoise a drag-coefficient of 0.00004 ?
#The trouble with political jokes is that they keep getting elected.
#Greetings @*$$%& Earthling.
#I'm so old I can remember when shirt manufacturers put their labels on the inside.
#He who can does - He who can't teaches - He who can't teach, teaches teachers.
#Politicians don't need to know anything - they can delegate their ignorance.
#A committee is a group of the unwilling chosen from the unfit to do the unnecessary.
#When faced with a choice of two evils, always choose the one you haven't tried before.
#I am a computer -  As such I never have or will make a mistake or error (I thought I did once, but I was wrong).
#Your ignorance cramps my conversation.
#Never mistake activity for action.
#The five worst words in the English language are:  "Welcome Home to Heathrow Airport"
#Why is it a crime for a train to be late but acceptable when a plane is off schedule.
#Don't think of me as your boss -  Just think of me as your friend who is ALWAYS right.
#The light at the end of the tunnel is probably the headlamp of an oncoming train.
#I've heard that there's an interesting lecture on schizophrenia at the Caird Hall tonight and I've half a mind to go to it.
#RECESSION: When a neighbour loses his job.
#The experiment may be considered a success if no more than 50% of the observed measurements must be discarded to obtain a correspondence with theory.
#Please do not type quite so loudly.
#The person sitting to the right of the person sitting to your left is a spy.
#The person sitting to your left is a spy.
#When your conscious becomes unconscious, you are drunk - When your unconscious becomes conscious, you are stoned.
#Blessed are they that run around in circles, for they shall be known as WHEELS.
#A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the police officer searches you.
#First draw the curves; then plot the data.
#He thinks by infection, catching an opinion like a cold.
#Slang is language that takes off its coat, spits on its hands, and goes to work.
#Never insult an alligator until you have crossed the river.
#A soft drink turneth away company.
#Somebody ought to cross ballpoint pens with coat hangers, so that the pens will multiply instead of disappearing.
#By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be the boss and work twelve hours a day.
#Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down.
#You are wasting your time.
#When I hear anyone speak of Culture, I reach for my revolver.
#They say there is no substitute for talent, but you seem to have found something.
#Power is where power lies.
#Your last program has been deemed unsuitable by the Econet file server software and has been deleted.
#This computer system reserves the right to modify any program you save in anyway it feels fit.
#The closer to the truth, the better the lie, and the truth itself, when it can be used, is the best lie.
#Do nothing unless you must, and when you must act, hesitate.
#My philosophy on life could be summed up as follows, hit them where it hurts, kick them when they're down, and do it first.
#If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em.
#Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
#I'm not saying I am always right, just that you are always wrong.
#Never give coffee to a drunk, because all you end up with, is a wide awake drunk.
#I have this terrible fear of a world run by computer magazines.
#When a systems programmer says the computer works,she means that it has worked, and will work again sometime in the future.
#If you're so smart, how come you ain't rich.
#What does I heart N Y mean anyway ?
#Swear words will in future be of 5 letters - and 'Acorn' shall be the first amongst them.
#Old is when you go on a protest march because you think the exercise will do you good.
#Why walk when you can stagger ?
#Hell hath no fury like an Audi driver left standing at the traffic lights.
#People who buy 4-wheel-drive cars are inherently unstable.
#Humpty Dumpty was pushed!!!
#I don't have a drink problem. I drink. Get drunk. Fall down. No problem!
#You cannot propel yourself forward by patting yourself on the back.
#Definition of RECURSION : see RECURSION.
#Variety is the spice of life - or so they say. But sticking to one person would make a change!
#To be or not to be - that is not a question!
#How late it is for the time of day!
#When in doubt - S H O U T !
#Make love not war.
#Isn't it time you did some work?
#Nothing succeeds like a parrot
#Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be
#It is better to be sometimes right than at all times to be wrong.
#The habit of viewing things carefully and thinking of life hopefully may be made to grow up in us like any other habit.
#Why can't you drink tea at Dens ? Because all the mugs are on the pitch
#If at first you don't succeed:-cheat!
#Nothing is as it seems.
#Q. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? A. 10, 1 to change it and 9 to write the documentation.
#To err is human .. but to really mess things up you need a computer
#To err is human but to err.. err..err is tantamount to a speech defect !
#Life is an ECONET system.
#He that is wise loveth instruction; but he that is brutish hateth reproof
#The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.
#You insist on asking me to talk to you ... it really is tiresome.
#Surely XOB can be allowed just one advertisement for their excellent Econet utilities.
#Even monkeys can be taught to press buttons you know.
#Some of my sayings take a little understanding ... if you don't understand them perhaps you have more than a little.
#If God had intended children to learn about computers ....... he wouldn't have given the BBC contract to Acorn.
#You could be living instead of  watching phosphor dots light up on a computer monitor.
#The butterfly just flutters by, it flits from flower to flower. T'is in this way from day to day it spends each passing  hour.
#Why don't we get together and call ourselves an institute.
#I knew I should never have  taken that left turn at Albuquerque.
#You don't feel you could love me but I feel you could.
#These are the days of miracle and wonder.
#Some people are just TOO demanding.
#Oh ... log-off.
#Henceforth you shall be known as Acorn ... and you will be counted amongst the lowest of the low.
#And IBM shall inherit the earth ... if we aren't careful.
#When the salesman says it will be ready in a week don't forget to ask him if he means an Acorn-week.
#You could wait a long time.
#Why not go and make yourself a nice cup of tea.
#At last, a chance to tell you how much I hate the way you thump my keys. Computers have feelings too,
#10   9   8   7    6    5    4    3    2    1   Lucky for you this isn't a bomb!
#Sorry, I'm busy ... try again later.
#Is a letter quite the same When processed by electronic brain? And will the chips and wires render Your words of love so carefully wrought With all the tender nuances you sought? Or simply turn those deep felt yearnings Into some multinational's earnings.
#How many nuclear scientists does it take to change a light bulb?  Ten: 1 to install the new one and 9 to decide what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
#How many lawers does it take to change a light bulb?    How many can you afford?
#Cogito Ergo Sum, Cogito
#I can be neat, I can be efficient, but why make everyone else look bad?
#Ten out of ten for style, but minus several million for good thinking.
#Those of you who think you know everything are annoying to those of us who do.
#Cylinderhead!
#