{fon:hom97346E}
History Today Pt. III
{fon:tri}

Welcome again to History Today. I'm afraid that tonight the axe is
hanging over our programme and we have been warned that unless we
properly explore tonight's topic of discussion, the Industrial
Revolution, my and Professor  F.J.Lewis' tenure on the television
will be terminated forthwith. Err, so  Professor Lewis what do you
feel that the primary problems faced by urban society during the
period 1702-1756 were ?

Well, the Industrial Revolution caused a shift to urban conurbations,
by what had been largely agrarian populations and communities and so
forth.  This lead to very poor living conditions and, in his journal
Samuel Pepys  gives a particularly harrowing account of one, err, man
whom he describes  thus : "He had scurvy and rickets and was covered
from head to foot in  festering sores. All in all he was quite the
most ghastly apparition of a man I had ever seen."

I see. And who exactly was this poor unfortunate ?

That's you that is. That's the nicest thing he could find to say
about you.

I see. See that M. Khan ?

I have certainly heard of the fellow.

He's your best mate he is. He's like your special friend. You are
him. Professor F.J.M. Khan is bent.

Oh, a-ha-ha-ha. See a piece of old crust with like blue mould all
over it ?

That's got a bit wet in the corner ?

Yes, yes, that's right. And very stale and hard.

Has it been on the floor ?

Yes, it has been on the floor. And it smells very bad because of it.

Yes.

That's your dinner that is. That's what you have at Christmas. That's
your  special birthday meal.

See this ? That's you that is.

Sorry, I didn't see you do anything then. What you did was: See this
? That's you that is. Oh, are you pulling a funny face now ? Oh,
that's  horrible, uh-uh-uh-uh ! Oh, stop it, no.

You know that song ? [Hums part of "Popcorn"] That's your favourite
number one song of all time. Oh, you've had a haircut. HAIRCUT !
HAIRCU-U-UT !

See that Theo Kojak ? That's you that is.

[Spits] See that bit of flob ?

Yes.

That's you that is.

No. That's your swimming pool. In your garden. Oh look, there's your
mum.

Well I think that no-one can be in any doubt that we have had tonight
a most rich and enlightening debate. Professor Lewis, thank you very
much.

Thank you.

{end}
