Court before the Duke of Albany's Palace.
 Enter LEAR, KENT, and FOOL.

Lear	Go you before to Gloucester with these letters. Acquaint my 
	daughter no further with anything you know than comes from 
	her demand out of the letter. If your diligence be not 
	speedy I shall be there afore you.

Kent	I will not sleep, my lord, till I have delivered your 
	letter.
												[Exit.

Fool	If a man's brains were in's heels, were't not in danger of 
	kibes?

Lear	Ay, boy.

Fool	Then I prithee, be merry; thy wit shall not go slipshod.

Lear	Ha, ha, ha!

Fool	Shalt see thy other daughter will use thee kindly; for 
	though she's as like this as a crab's like an apple, yet I 
	can tell what I can tell.

Lear	What canst tell, boy?

Fool	She will taste as like this as a crab does to a crab. Thou 
	canst tell why one's nose stands i'th'middle on's face?

Lear	No.

Fool	Why, to keep one's eyes of either side's nose, that what a 
	man cannot smell out, he may spy into.

Lear	I did her wrong.

Fool	Canst tell how an oyster makes his shell?

Lear	No.

Fool	Nor I neither; but I can tell why a snail has a house.

Lear	Why?

Fool	Why, to put's head in; not to give it away to his 
	daughters, and leave his horns without a case.

Lear	I will forget my nature. So kind a father! Be my horses 
	ready?

Fool	Thy asses are gone about 'em. The reason why the seven 
	stars are no more than seven is a pretty reason.

Lear	Because they are not eight.

Fool	Yes, indeed. Thou wouldst make a good fool.

Lear	To take't again perforce! Monster Ingratitude!

Fool	If thou wert my Fool, Nuncle, I'd have thee beaten for 
	being old before thy time.

Lear	How's that?

Fool	Thou shouldst not have been old till thou hadst been wise.

Lear	O, let me not be mad, not mad, sweet heaven!
	Keep me in temper; I would not be mad!

                           Enter 1st GENTLEMAN.

	How now, are the horses ready?

1st Gentleman	Ready, my lord.

Lear	Come, boy.

Fool	She that's a maid now, and laughs at my departure,
	Shall not be a maid long, unless things be cut shorter.
												[Exeunt.
